Reframing Leadership Consulting
Specializing in Leadership Development
  • Home
  • About
    • Conceptual Framework
    • Gallery
  • Meet Our Team
    • Testimonials
  • Prior Speaking Engagements
  • Accessible Leadership Blog
  • Video Clips
  • Contact Us

IT'S THE PERSON NOT THE POSITION THAT MATTERS

2/24/2014

1 Comment

 
By Todd M. Wysocki, Ph.D.

You earn the respect of others when you give others the respect they deserve. Mutual respect, regardless of your position, opens the door to meaningful connections.  When we adhere to roles inherent to our position, relationships cannot transcend traditional boundaries and limits the potential to be a real and positive influence in the life of another. It is not the title or job we hold, but rather it is who we are and how we treat others that define our character and our approach to working with others. When we invite others to engage in an authentic manner, we build relationship and become accessible to others. Having an open door policy is a necessary requisite; however, the invitation to connect only seems plausible when the person behind the door is seen as open and approachable.  It is this ability to connect with others that is one of the key components of accessibility leadership and mentorship.

During my tenure in higher education, I have had the opportunity to interact with thousands of students. My job as a professor is to impart knowledge and facilitate learning; yet it is what I have learned from my students that has shaped my work and my ideologies.  Sometimes the most powerful ideas are the simple ones directly in front of us.  We just need to open our eyes and open ourselves up to seeing the potential within ourselves and others. And, most importantly, realize and embrace the importance of developing real and meaningful relationships.  The basic tenet of any relationship is built on mutual respect.  We connect with others when we are real, respectful, open, genuine and approachable – qualities necessary for accessibility.  These qualities are essential to be an effective leader, teacher or mentor.  Having held each of these roles in various capacities, experience has taught me that it is the person and not the position that has influence.  While the position may provide opportunities to interact with others, it is the individual who seizes the chance to connect and be a person of influence.

The position and title one has, while fundamental to structure and function, often can be a detriment in relationships. We, as educators or leaders, can easily get caught up in our title and assign unnecessary importance to the position.  When doing so, we often hide behind the title which in turn becomes a barrier rather than means of working towards a partnership.  The teacher commanding the classroom without disruption or interaction, the leader imparting orders without input and collaboration, the mentor providing guidance and advice without knowing the person or the issue.  These scenarios, unfortunately, are all too often the norm rather than the exception.

I have too often witnessed colleagues talking to college students as if they were talking to a child – in a condescending tone and an authoritarian manner. When we treat others as children, they are more likely to respond and act in childish ways.  When we treat others as partners in the process and show them genuineness, they respond in kind. Then, the connection becomes real and without boundaries. We can only become a person of influence when we break down the wall and barrier a title or position can bring. We become a person of influence when we see our work as a collaboration and a partnership; and value and respect others regardless of roles. Give respect, value the person, expect the best, and demand more.  You may be pleasantly surprised by the response.

As a mentor to emergent student leaders and professionals in higher education over the years, I have been a conduit of feedback to others. My advice is simple. Be respectful, value the person, strive to connect, be yourself and be present in the moment. When we do this, others will willingly walk through the door.  Who knows – your student or mentee may someday become a person of influence for others.


1 Comment

LIFE'S NOT ABOUT WHAT'S BETTER THAN

2/9/2014

0 Comments

 
By Jake R. Goldblum

I like to say “Life is pretty cool,” a lot. Sometimes people ask me what I mean by that, but mostly they just ignore it like most things I say (rightfully so in most cases I suppose.) So, what do I mean when I say this expression? I don’t randomly throw the saying around at will. Most of the time I say it when I’m feeling really good about something in my life (that happens a lot because I’m a very fortunate person thanks to those around me.) I guess this phrase is my equivalent to “Life is good.”

What’s so “cool” about my life though? On one hand, I don’t come from an affluent background. I’m not the biggest, tallest, or most attractive guy in town; and life hasn’t always been the easiest. On the other hand, I have the opportunity to go to an amazing university where I am around thousands of highly intellectual people. I have the opportunity to work with hundreds of students on a daily basis, where I have the opportunity to help them become more effective people. I have the opportunity to have amazing friends and relationships with people who have made me a better person.

On a less deep note, I have the opportunity to exercise daily and do yoga (which is really tough by the way.) I have the opportunity to listen to artists like John Butler, O.A.R. and Katy Perry (yes that Katy Perry.) I have the opportunity to go to my fraternity house and hangout until four in the morning. I have that same opportunity in the staff office of my residence hall (which happens quite frequently.) I have the opportunity to laugh and cry with friends who are graduating. I also have the opportunity to graduate myself and reminisce with friends about great times we’ve had together. I have the opportunity to make people smile. I have the opportunity to call several friends/mentors and tell them I love them. I have the opportunity to call a father, grandmother and grandfather and tell them I love them.

I have had the opportunity to be a student, teacher, brother, son, mentor, mentee, friend, lover, leader, exercise buff, music fiend, night owl, morning hater, dancer, reader, author, experimenter, test subject, advisor, advisee, and so so much more. I have had many opportunities and have taken advantage of them all. I feel as though I have been pretty lucky, and that my life really has been pretty cool. Maybe we should stop and sit back sometimes and realize how lucky we really are. Maybe we should start living our lives in the moment and actively engaged with the world around us. Maybe we should start living for the four AM conversations, because hey, who knows maybe those will make someone else’s life pretty cool.

0 Comments

    Authors

    "In an effort to engage, enlighten and empower leaders everywhere, Reframing Leadership Consulting offers perspective on many key issues. We do not hope, or claim to, solve these issues; however we hope to lend a new lens through which to view and assess these issues, in an effort to resolve them." 

    Archives

    January 2019
    April 2016
    November 2015
    October 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    April 2015
    January 2015
    October 2014
    June 2014
    February 2014
    January 2014

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Powered by Create your own unique website with customizable templates.